Wandering

Today, I can’t seem to follow through with any one task. I can’t sit still or focus my thoughts. I’m just jumpy.

I think it’s because I am mentally wandering in search of a center, answers, and a way out of my rut. What better time to get out of a rut than right now? The New Year!? So, while looking for a fresh start and thinking about what the new year will bring, I did the following logical things:

  • Asked my husband what he thought would happen in 2012 (He feels confident the world will not end with the Mayan calendar. Well let’s hope not! Add that to my list of things to worry about why do’t you?!)
  • Talked to my sister about what she was thinking and hoping for the new year (We got side tracked and talked about everything else under the sun, ’cause that’s how we roll.)

and

  • Read my horoscope (because nothing says I’m an intelligent planner and abstract thinker feeling lost like jokingly seriously reading your horoscope for incites into yourself, your career, and (sure I’m human too) my love life (I’m married, but I’m not dead!)

So, this is what I’m being told about what 2012 will hold for me:

“If the past few years haven’t been all that great, Aries, take heart. On New Year’s Eve, the Moon conjoins Uranus, planet of luck, in your sign. Both these planets connect with Venus, planet of love and money.  Don’t waste any time wondering what your lucky breaks might be. With Uranus, you can expect the unexpected. Whatever comes your way will be something that will bring hope, happiness, good fortune – and relief! Your luck won’t fizzle out as the year crawls forward, either. By midsummer, Venus will be conjunct Jupiter, so both your finances and your love life will still be going strong.

(from Horoscope.com)

Well, I am feeling a little more hopeful after reading that! BUT, of course I can’t be patient about finding out what my ‘luck’ will be in the new year (what do I look like? A Libra?!) so I tried to find more info on another site…

“A compromise may be in order…Marriage, contracts and partnerships are seen as keys to success and happiness–they have plenty of lessons to teach you. A lady named Martha Graham once said, “Because there is only one of you, in all time, your expression is unique. If you block it, it will be lost.” Keep your creative channels open by diving into some creative venture… Try something new and challenging–your imagination will surprise you!”

(from dailyhoroscopes.com)

Waaaaait a minute. I might have to compromise to have this luck, and be creative, AND challenge myself? Look, I’ve already got shit to do. It’s on my lists and calendars and I’ve got alarms set on my phone to remind me. I was just looking for the ‘luck’ I was told about in horoscope #1! This sounds less like ‘luck’ and more like ‘work,’ and, let me tell you, today, it aint happening! My head it all wrong and fuzzy and messed up and all I can do is wander mentally and physically, so someone had better give me a better answer….So then I found this:

“You probably have a clear set of objectives and understand why it’s important to tie up loose ends today. However, your mind is on everything except work because you’re eager for the weekend to begin. The Moon’s presence in your 12th House of Escapism opposes action-hero Mars in your 6th House of Employment, enticing you to find ways to avoid doing much of anything. Unfortunately, you’ll pay the price for procrastinating, so bite the bullet and get your chores done before it’s too late.”

(from huffingtonpost.com)

Ah. Well at least now I know how to get my luck – stop procrastinating – and an explanation for my unfocused head – my moon’s presence in my 12th House of Escapism opposes action-hero Mars in my 6th House of Employment. ‘Nuf said.

– Claire

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About onaclaireday

I am a wife, a mother, a social worker, a writer, a crafter, and a seeker who is trying to blend all of my passions into one balanced life. Usually my path feels cloudy, but occasionally, on a clear day, 'getting it right' feels so close I can smell it. Here I'll write about that journey sharing about whatever strikes my fancy from good books I'm reading to interior design. Thanks for reading and sharing your journey too. - Claire
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