Back in the saddle

Learning to be a mom again

My husband has been out of town for five days and I have had the pleasure (thanks to my lay off) to be a full time mom for the first time in over a year. It’s been an adjustment and I’ve leaned on moms I respect and trust to guide me in getting back in the ‘mom saddle’ and reengaging with my parenting.

Sounds odd to say that I have to get ‘back in the saddle’ of being a mom, but for the past year and a half (I’ve now realized) I was not fully present in my home life. A week ago, if I was asked to describe myself I would have listed ‘social worker’ first and probably mom and wife last. This wasn’t in order of importance to me, but in order of what I did, thought about, and focused on the most.

Where I was

Writing this now I cringe. I hate to think that I was missing out of this amazing little girl growing before me because I was too involved in my career, but there it is. The ugly truth. I was not present in my home life. The ‘why?’ behind all this will be explored later, but the long and the short of it is that I wasn’t giving my family my all emotionally and now I am.

This is one of the ‘happy accidents’ of my lay off. It doesn’t mean that to be a great mom one can’t work. It means that for me, I needed the perspective that my lay off brought. I needed help to realize what I wasn’t doing and what I was missing out on.

Where I am

This week my little one and I have been doing some serious bonding in and out of the house. At home we’ve been sinking our teeth into the last of the summer season. Out on the town, we’ve been taking in all our city has to offer from the farmers’ market, to live music, to Shakespeare in the Park.

I’m thankful for so much this week:

  • A weekend with just my daughter and myself
  • The support of wise moms
  • The love of my husband
  • The openness of my city

I can’t wait to see what next week brings.

– Claire

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About onaclaireday

I am a wife, a mother, a social worker, a writer, a crafter, and a seeker who is trying to blend all of my passions into one balanced life. Usually my path feels cloudy, but occasionally, on a clear day, 'getting it right' feels so close I can smell it. Here I'll write about that journey sharing about whatever strikes my fancy from good books I'm reading to interior design. Thanks for reading and sharing your journey too. - Claire
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